I've always wondered about those of you who read this blog.. assuming the number of views my posts have raked up since this blog was published does not amount to bots, haha. If there's no response to gauge the so-called worth of this blog, then why the hell am I still writing? First off, the "shocker": whether you like it or not, many of the experiences we go through as a mother tend to make us feel we are so isolated from other moms out there. The support we receive from mommy friends is important, and I'm forever thankful to each and every one who has been within reach for me when everything seems to be falling apart. I'm not kidding when I say that ScaryMommy is the only social media platform that I can relate to up till now. The sarcasm, the misadventures in motherhood... haha. Seriously though, as a full-time working mother, where caregiving for working moms falls at the merciful hands of daycare centers and/or unpaid caregivers in the form of in laws...

I was away for four days for work travel for the very first time as a mom last January.. and here I am finally having the luxury of time to blog about it. In March #momlife Need I say this was my first work travel after... two years of being in Track I? 9 months postpartum and we still don't have a helper at home. Imagine when my husband gave me the blessing to travel for work towards the end of last year-- I was pretty much shocked to the core. How can this man possibly let me off to travel for work when taking care of a baby takes almost all of your time? He reassured me that he could do it and he was fine. To say it was difficult is an understatement indeed. The whole four days apart were filled with so much tears. Mine, our son's...  There's no doubt that ugly tears were shed from an already sleep-deprived, ugly face. Yours truly shall confess to crying as the plane was about to take off, and pretty much almost every night before going to sleep #separationanxi...

I love long weekends. It's a much welcomed respite considering "leave is a privilege and not a right" but if it really is, then you can probably start asking why the general rule allows us 3.5 days off for every month of work.  (and to whom it may concern -- what are you doing here and why are you even reading this?). This long weekend is all the more welcome considering that this is after two grueling weeks of being trampled over at work for multiple reasons: problematic personnel, frustrating administrative arrangements and ad hoc stuff that has pretty much defined my work (and husband's). Today is also my son's half birthday, hehe. And a replacement public holiday in conjunction with the Prophet's birthday (PBUH). Being a working pumping mom, I tend to struggle with finding a safe, comfortable space to pump. Which reminds me... I should share this story. My first one was for a week-long workshop on GO and FR which was in October. Despite the fact...

Hi, y'all. For some personal reasons I had to keep my blog under the radar for an indefinite until a few things were resolved in my life before starting work. (Also because my son is bad at napping at home during weekends so I cannot really blog properly hehehe) It all began with a helper drama towards the end of my maternity leave.  Long story made short, I don't have a helper. Short story made long, my helper pretty much made me (and my husband indirectly) look like horrible and incompetent employers. Funny enough, she'd like to work with me again but that I should also understand her situation. What situation exactly? God knows. So many times I insisted on telling her to tell me if she has any concerns but she insisted she was fine. Then somehow came the part where she was hearing voices and right there I knew I had to let this one go. That part was the last straw; I was already stressed out dealing with adjusting to being a mother and having a place of my own and ...

This post was written sometime towards the end of my leave (end of August to early September) I don't know about you guys, but I have to say that my life pre-baby/pre-marriage was really a blast . For one, you don't simply ship a kampong girl to live in the United States for six years to study. I was born and raised in Brunei my entire life, then as it happened I was given the opportunity to be abroad.  Like everyone else, tertiary education period is a very formative time in my life that helped shape my principles and beliefs about life. Having graduated from University of Michigan - Ann Arbor and Georgetown University for graduate school, I took my endeavors at school seriously, because towards the end of graduate school I was at risk of failing my program entirely-- not even halfway into the first semester of grad school and already I wanted to purposely quit so I could go home. -_- Sometime before graduating from Georgetown I remember succumbing to the idea that perha...