I saw this on the paper some weeks ago:
I found myself hysterical when I first saw this. I somehow stopped laughing and turned pensive when one of my seniors shared the same image in a Whatsapp group chat and said the illustration was done in poor taste.
Then I asked myself: was I laughing at the "stark humor", not realizing the subtle sexism that I have sadly internalized over the years, or was I laughing at the sad irony of the reality?
With the exception of a few progressive, practice-what-you-preach kind of men around us, men expect women to come home and do the household work.
Cooking for the family--do you have any idea how difficult it is to decide on what to cook sometimes even?
Cleaning the house-- let us be real ladies: piles of clean laundry in the basket still can appear dirty.
Tending to the kids range from breastfeeding the baby to comforting the angry toddler and if you are a seasoned parent, this also means attending to the preschooler's homework.
Sadly, with all these tasks on our to-do list, women are STILL expected to look good for their husbands after all these "duties".
Don't lie, you still remember the ustaz/ustazah who taught you to smell nice and berhias (beautify oneself) for your partner.
Look, I love bags, shoes and clothes to a point that even my dearest husband sometimes questions my sartorial choices hehe. And despite my petite figure, I am all for body positivity. For me, keeping an active and healthy lifestyle is key-- I would like to keep fit as much as I can with adequate exercise in the week. Even if it comes at the expense of unnecessary comments like "but you're so kurus already"... -_-
The married women of today's time are just so.. different, let's just use that word. How is it that mothers who back then had more than TEN kids are able to live a long, healthy life? Did it have to do with better nutrition resources (almost organic diet, pesticide and chemical-free plants and free range chicken?)? How is it that even a mother of one struggles to muster energy even to make dinner after work?
Have we succumbed to the idea of success in life for a woman means having a college/university education and a job that pays at least 2.6 grand, and a husband and kids to boot?
You know, some days I just want to quit my job, other days I want to be a top executive earning at least double of what I earn today. Some days I wish to be content with being where I am now for it allows me quality time to be with my family, but other days I find myself wishing I were in the right place to make my organization better.
It is difficult to be a chronic overachiever, I tell you.
So back to the photo.
While I am annoyed at the man's reaction to tell his spouse to spin to generate energy for the kitchen and household errands, I am more ticked off at the fact that the man is oblivious to the fact that his wife perhaps is taking charge of her well-being outside the home because she knows that to be able to take care of others, she must be able to take care of herself. There is and should never be no shame in being selfish to be able to care and love oneself.
Time and again, I still find myself trying to reconcile the responsibility of a woman being the nurturer/carer at home and her role to better society by being an active member in her immediate community through various endeavors. With that said, let us focus on the present: having to shoulder all sorts of responsibilities at work, and realizing that many women are still expected to make her house a home for the family, to expect them to be able to do EVERYTHING meticulously is just rather unrealistic. Unless if she has additional help, some more family members' helping hand...
A bit of therapy for her every now and then wouldn't harm either ;) at the end of the day, a well-maintained woman is a reflection of the man who is beside her.
What do you think? :)
I found myself hysterical when I first saw this. I somehow stopped laughing and turned pensive when one of my seniors shared the same image in a Whatsapp group chat and said the illustration was done in poor taste.
Then I asked myself: was I laughing at the "stark humor", not realizing the subtle sexism that I have sadly internalized over the years, or was I laughing at the sad irony of the reality?
With the exception of a few progressive, practice-what-you-preach kind of men around us, men expect women to come home and do the household work.
Cooking for the family--do you have any idea how difficult it is to decide on what to cook sometimes even?
Cleaning the house-- let us be real ladies: piles of clean laundry in the basket still can appear dirty.
Tending to the kids range from breastfeeding the baby to comforting the angry toddler and if you are a seasoned parent, this also means attending to the preschooler's homework.
Sadly, with all these tasks on our to-do list, women are STILL expected to look good for their husbands after all these "duties".
Don't lie, you still remember the ustaz/ustazah who taught you to smell nice and berhias (beautify oneself) for your partner.
Look, I love bags, shoes and clothes to a point that even my dearest husband sometimes questions my sartorial choices hehe. And despite my petite figure, I am all for body positivity. For me, keeping an active and healthy lifestyle is key-- I would like to keep fit as much as I can with adequate exercise in the week. Even if it comes at the expense of unnecessary comments like "but you're so kurus already"... -_-
The married women of today's time are just so.. different, let's just use that word. How is it that mothers who back then had more than TEN kids are able to live a long, healthy life? Did it have to do with better nutrition resources (almost organic diet, pesticide and chemical-free plants and free range chicken?)? How is it that even a mother of one struggles to muster energy even to make dinner after work?
Have we succumbed to the idea of success in life for a woman means having a college/university education and a job that pays at least 2.6 grand, and a husband and kids to boot?
You know, some days I just want to quit my job, other days I want to be a top executive earning at least double of what I earn today. Some days I wish to be content with being where I am now for it allows me quality time to be with my family, but other days I find myself wishing I were in the right place to make my organization better.
It is difficult to be a chronic overachiever, I tell you.
So back to the photo.
While I am annoyed at the man's reaction to tell his spouse to spin to generate energy for the kitchen and household errands, I am more ticked off at the fact that the man is oblivious to the fact that his wife perhaps is taking charge of her well-being outside the home because she knows that to be able to take care of others, she must be able to take care of herself. There is and should never be no shame in being selfish to be able to care and love oneself.
Time and again, I still find myself trying to reconcile the responsibility of a woman being the nurturer/carer at home and her role to better society by being an active member in her immediate community through various endeavors. With that said, let us focus on the present: having to shoulder all sorts of responsibilities at work, and realizing that many women are still expected to make her house a home for the family, to expect them to be able to do EVERYTHING meticulously is just rather unrealistic. Unless if she has additional help, some more family members' helping hand...
A bit of therapy for her every now and then wouldn't harm either ;) at the end of the day, a well-maintained woman is a reflection of the man who is beside her.
What do you think? :)
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